Adulthood comes with a heavy load of so-called “adulting” rules—guidelines handed down from previous generations about what it means to be responsible, successful, or “normal.”
But how many of these expectations are actually necessary? How many are relics of a different era?
In a world that’s changing faster than ever, it’s time to challenge the conventional wisdom.
Not every rule we inherit deserves to be followed.
This article invites you to rethink which norms matter, and which ones might just be nonsense.
1. You Must Own a House to Be Successful
The idea that owning a house equals success is deeply ingrained in our culture.
Yet, with soaring prices and shifting lifestyles, many young adults are choosing to rent, live with roommates, or explore alternative housing.
Is homeownership really the gold standard? Not anymore.
According to Pew Research, fewer young adults own homes than ever before.
Renting or exploring nontraditional living spaces is just as valid—and often smarter for today’s realities.
2. You Have to Get Married by a Certain Age
There’s a persistent myth that you’re supposed to get married by your late twenties or early thirties, as if it’s a box to check off on the way to adulthood.
But marriage rates have declined, and more people are delaying—or skipping—marriage entirely, often finding greater fulfillment on their own terms.
Happiness isn’t defined by a wedding ring or a timeline.
According to CDC data, Americans are marrying later, if at all, and that’s perfectly okay.
3. You Must Have Kids to Be Fulfilled
Society often suggests that having children is the only true path to fulfillment.
But countless adults find deep satisfaction in their careers, passions, friendships, or by contributing to their communities. Choosing not to have kids isn’t selfish—it’s just another valid choice. According to Pew Research, a growing number of adults are opting out of parenthood for a variety of reasons, and their lives are no less meaningful or complete.
4. Real Adults Don’t Need Help from Their Parents
There’s a lingering belief that needing support from your parents means you’re not a “real” adult.
In truth, multigenerational households and family assistance are the norm in many cultures—and increasingly common in the U.S. too. Life is unpredictable and support systems matter.
As noted by The New York Times, more adults are living with family than ever. There’s no shame in leaning on those who care.
5. You Need a 9-to-5 Job for Stability
The classic 9-to-5 job is often touted as the only “real” way to achieve financial security.
But the rise of freelancing, gig work, and entrepreneurship has changed what stability looks like.
Many people now thrive outside the traditional office structure—building flexible, rewarding careers on their own terms.
As highlighted in Forbes, the gig economy is booming, and so are the opportunities to create your own version of success.
6. Debt Is a Sign of Irresponsibility
Many believe that carrying debt means you’ve failed at adulting, but this simply isn’t true.
Debt is often unavoidable—used for education, buying a home, or handling emergencies.
The real key is how you manage it.
According to Federal Reserve statistics, debt is a common part of modern life. Responsible borrowing and repayment are what matter—not the mere existence of debt.
7. Adults Should Drink Coffee, Not Juice or Soda
There’s an odd expectation that real adults drink coffee, while juice or soda is for kids.
But your beverage choice is about taste and health, not age.
As Harvard Health notes, coffee has its pros and cons, but so do other drinks.
Drink what you enjoy—there’s no maturity test in your mug.
8. You Have to Dress ‘Professionally’ Every Day
The idea that adults must wear stiff suits or business attire daily is fading fast.
More workplaces are embracing casual and expressive styles, allowing people to feel comfortable and authentic.
Productivity and confidence often thrive when you dress like yourself.
As reported by BBC Worklife, the traditional office dress code is becoming a thing of the past.
9. Adults Don’t Play Video Games or Watch Cartoons
It’s a tired stereotype that video games and cartoons are only for children.
In reality, millions of adults unwind, connect, and even bond over gaming or animated shows.
Enjoying these forms of entertainment doesn’t make you less mature.
According to Statista, the average age of U.S. gamers is well into adulthood.
Fun has no expiration date.
10. You Need to Have Life ‘Figured Out’ by 30
The notion that everything should be settled by your thirtieth birthday is a persistent myth.
In truth, most people reinvent themselves several times—changing careers, moving cities, or shifting priorities as they grow.
There’s no universal timetable for personal or professional milestones.
As highlighted in Psychology Today, adulthood is a lifelong process of learning and discovery.
It’s perfectly normal not to have everything “figured out” at any age.
11. You Should Never Move Back Home
There’s a stigma around moving back in with your parents as an adult, but it’s often a wise and practical move. Whether for financial reasons, career changes, or emotional support, returning home can create space for growth. It’s not a setback—it’s a strategic choice for many.
As CNN reports, more young adults are making this decision than ever before.
12. Owning a Car is Essential
The belief that every adult must own a car is losing traction, especially in cities. Public transit, biking, and rideshare services are often healthier, cheaper, and more sustainable choices. For many, car ownership is more hassle than convenience. As noted by NPR, younger generations are rethinking the need for cars entirely, prioritizing flexibility and environmental impact instead.
13. You Must Have a Perfect Credit Score
There’s a lot of stress around achieving a flawless credit score, but the truth is, “perfect” isn’t necessary.
Most lenders and landlords look for scores that are simply good enough—not impeccable.
Small mistakes or fluctuations won’t ruin your life.
According to Experian, a “good” score opens almost all the same doors as an excellent one.
14. Real Adults Don’t Cry or Show Vulnerability
The “stiff upper lip” myth claims that adults should never cry or reveal their struggles.
In reality, emotional intelligence and openness are vital for healthy relationships and self-growth.
Vulnerability is not weakness—it’s courage.
As Harvard Business Review explains, showing your true feelings can foster connection, trust, and resilience.
Mature adults know that feeling—and sharing—emotions is a sign of real strength.
15. You Have to Eat ‘Grown-Up’ Foods
Why are some foods considered “too childish” for adults? There’s nothing wrong with loving mac and cheese or cereal at any age. Comfort food is comfort food, no matter how old you are. As the New York Times points out, eating what you enjoy is part of real adulthood.
16. You Must Be Busy to Be Valuable
There’s a modern myth that being constantly busy equals being important or successful.
But nonstop activity isn’t the same as true productivity or happiness. Rest and leisure are crucial for creativity and mental health. As explored by BBC Worklife, embracing downtime is a sign of balance—not laziness. You don’t need an overflowing calendar to prove your worth.
17. You Can’t Change Careers After 30
The idea that career paths are set in stone after a certain age is outdated.
People regularly switch fields in their 30s, 40s, and beyond—often finding more passion and purpose.
It’s never too late to pursue new interests or opportunities.
As Harvard Business Review notes, career change is normal and can be the key to long-term happiness.
18. You Should Have a Five-Year Plan
There’s constant pressure to map out the next five years as if life is predictable and controllable.
Rigid plans can actually limit growth and opportunity. Embracing flexibility and adapting to change is often more valuable than sticking to a script. According to Forbes, five-year plans frequently fail because life rarely goes as expected.
19. Adults Don’t Need Close Friendships
The notion that adulthood means growing apart from close friends couldn’t be further from the truth.
Meaningful friendships aren’t just for childhood—they’re essential for happiness, resilience, and even physical health. Strong social ties can help you navigate life’s challenges and boost overall well-being.
As Mayo Clinic explains, investing in friendship is a smart and healthy part of adulthood.
20. You Should Always Have a ‘Side Hustle’
The hustle culture mantra says every adult needs a side gig to be ambitious or secure. But not everyone thrives juggling multiple jobs or income streams. It’s okay to prioritize rest, hobbies, or family over endless work. As The Guardian highlights, work-life balance matters just as much as hustle.
21. You Need to Travel the World to Be Cultured
There’s a widespread belief that traveling the globe is the only way to gain culture or perspective.
While travel can be enriching, it’s also a privilege that not everyone can access. Personal growth, learning, and meaningful connections can happen right where you live. As National Geographic notes, engaging with your local community can be just as transformative as any trip abroad.
22. You Have to Wake Up Early to Be Productive
The idea that successful adults are all early risers is more myth than fact.
Productivity is about finding your own rhythm—some people do their best work at night, not at dawn.
There’s no universal formula for getting things done.
According to the Sleep Foundation, honoring your natural chronotype leads to better focus and performance, regardless of the hour.
23. You Shouldn’t Ask for Help or Therapy
Many still believe that adults should handle everything on their own, but this mindset is both harmful and outdated. Seeking therapy or asking for support is a sign of self-awareness and strength, not weakness. Mental health matters just as much as physical health. The American Psychological Association dispels common therapy myths and urges everyone to reach out when needed.
24. You Must Follow a Strict Fitness Routine
The pressure to stick to a rigid gym schedule can make fitness feel like a chore.
In reality, health is about finding movement you enjoy—whether that’s hiking, dancing, or gardening.
Consistency and enjoyment matter more than perfection.
According to the CDC, a variety of activities can support lifelong well-being, and there’s no single “right” way to be fit.
25. Adulting Means Never Making Mistakes
One of the most damaging myths is that real adults don’t mess up.
In truth, mistakes are inevitable—and often the best teachers. Growth comes from learning, not from being flawless. As Psychology Today explains, embracing errors is essential for resilience and wisdom.
Perfection isn’t a requirement for adulthood—being willing to try, fail, and try again is.
Conclusion
The so-called “rules of adulting” are often arbitrary, outdated, and even counterproductive.
As we’ve explored, there’s no single path to adulthood—no checklist that guarantees happiness or success.
True maturity comes from self-awareness, flexibility, and living authentically.
It’s time to question what really matters and give ourselves permission to break free from unnecessary expectations.